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Trophy Wife to Surgeon

Written By Victoria Johnson, MD

Through the 20 plus years that I have been an aesthetic medical doctor, my patients ask me how I do what I do. I really didn’t know the answer. So, I decided to write it down.

I spend about 50-60% of my time counseling patients and staff.  When a patient comes to see me, they already have something that they are unhappy with. I feel that is my most rewarding challenge. To get to the bottom of why they are seeking aesthetic treatments.

Patients confide in and are usually a little embarrassed. They say things like, “I really want to tell you something but I’m afraid that you won’t be able to understand.”

After a while as I was writing my book, I wanted to share some of the many difficulties and misery that I suffered in my quest to break free of abuse.

I thought to myself, everyone has bad memories or situations that they are currently in or have experienced. I wanted to share my struggles.

My motivation to change came with the extreme emotional pain that I suffered at the hands of my husband. I realized that I had become a nobody! I felt like an empty shell. My husband would just say your job is the shut up and look good!

The pain became unbearable, and I turned closer to God and Jesus Christ. I went into a period of devout fasting and prayer. I told the Lord that I was going to hold onto his robes until he healed me like the woman with the issue of blood in the Bible did.

My devotion and prayers were nonstop. I was not going to live in this pain any longer. There had to be something that I could do.

Then one night I was awakened and went into my living room. I felt the need to kneel and pray. I heard the Lord say, “you are going to be a doctor!” I was amazed and in disbelief.  I only had a high school diploma ten years earlier.  Nonetheless, I thought that I had no other choice, so I began to explore the possibility of going to college.

The struggles continued for four more years with my husband, but I was so rock solid in the faith that I had a calling on my life. That knowledge gave me the strength to endure his abuse which was considerable.

I began to get emotionally stronger and was able to fend off his attacks. He slowly eased up as he saw my resolve, but he was still quite abusive.

I began to not only believe in the message from the Lord, but to believe in my own growing emotional and spiritual strength.

I share my story with my patients as I feel it might help them.  I love my patients and my staff and find ways to help them with their daily lives. 

I love asking myself, why this patient is here about their outer appearances. 

I believe that all that I have endured and thrived through could help others have the faith and confidence in themselves to keep going. Keep pursuing your goal, no matter what.

Fear is the greatest liar! I learned as it would come over me, that if I just walked straight forward through it towards my goal, the victory would be mine!

I have also become quite confident and fearless. I want to impart that to others. Take risks!

Just take a deep breath and jump!

Keep your hearts and minds close to God and His Son and you will have help beyond belief!

I want people to look at me and say that if I can do it then so can they.  Stand up to abuse and fight for your independence.  Believe that you are worth it! 

As I continue my journey, I feel a rocklike stillness and strength in my spirit.  It’s almost as though the Lord has placed a protective shield around me.

 I had to write my book. I wanted to share the struggles I went through but also the love and joy that is in my life now.  I want my story to hopefully help others who are downtrodden to have hope.

 If I can do it, then so can they!

Psilocybin and Interconnectedness: Understanding ‘Oceanic Boundlessness’ in Psychedelics

Magic mushrooms can teach us a valuable lesson about our support systems, making us feel less alone

Written By Jennifer Chesak, Psychedelic POV Contributor

We all need a little oceanic boundlessness in our lives in 2024. If you’re opening your favorite travel app to book a cruise or a beach vacation right now, that’s not what I mean.

“Oceanic boundlessness” is a term to describe feeling at one with the world as whole, as if you’re part of something greater than yourself. It’s a feeling many experience while on psilocybin.[1] And after a macrodose, the lasting effects of oceanic boundlessness can have profound benefits for well-being.

Oceanic boundlessness showed up for me during my psilocybin journey. I felt as though threads of light were connecting me to everyone I know and love and who I know loves and cares for me. Their love for me surged my way—almost as if along an electrical current. And I sent my love to all of them while visualizing their locations as points on a map. Their love cradled and buoyed me, as if they were holding space for my unfolding experience and championing me on. The best part: the feeling has been lasting.

“Oceanic feeling” is a philosophical term coined by Romain Rolland, a French mystic, in a letter to Sigmund Freud nearly 100 years ago. This term encompasses the concept of having no bounds, or boundaries, between self and other or the world at large. It’s a sense of universal interconnectedness. This oceanic feeling, Freud suggested, is present when we’re young, before we develop our identity or ego. But as we become more preoccupied with sense of self while growing into adults, we lose that sensation.

So how do we get back to oceanic boundlessness, and why is it beneficial? Psilocybin, and some other psychedelics, can facilitate oceanic boundlessness through another concept called “ego death” or “ego dissolution.” We have a network of brain regions that work together to form our sense of self. This network is called the default mode network, and when we’re on a psychedelic, some parts of the DMN that normally connect will temporarily disconnect, while other parts that don’t normally connect will connect. As a result, we may experience elements of ego death, where our sense of self becomes less of a focus. Therefore those boundaries between self and other, or the rest of the world, dissolve. Hence, oceanic boundlessness.

Who makes up your support system? Right now you’re probably thinking of various friends and family members. You generally know you can call or text this person or that person if you’re having a bad day. But have you ever really “felt” that support system—felt it in your body?

That’s what I experienced on psilocybin. I could feel the tenderness that one of my oldest friends Mark has for me—and I for him. I could feel the unbreakable bond my friend Sara and I have. I could feel the entirety of my relationship with my husband. I felt these sensations in my every cell—and I’m still feeling them.

Oceanic boundlessness gives you the profound knowledge that, no matter how alone you might feel during certain life challenges, you are never truly alone. And that has made all the difference in my life going forward.

In 2018, my mom was diagnosed with an aggressive form of cancer. And in 2019, she was diagnosed with a different cancer. Although my mom is doing well now, these cancer diagnoses, the fact that both my parents are in the last stretch of their lives, and the process of helping to manage their care have all given me a lot of anxiety. We all lose our parents eventually, but knowing that these losses are a fact of life did nothing to resolve my distress. When we’re going through these difficult times, often in middle age, we tend to feel alone and isolate ourselves in our worries. But that doesn’t help us. What does help is tapping into our support systems—but how often do we do that?

I embarked on my first therapeutic psilocybin journey in 2022. Now, I no longer feel isolated by what I’m going through; instead, I feel more connected than ever. I joke that the mushroom acted as the Kool-Aid Man from those ’70s and ’80s commercials, crashing through the walls I’ve carefully built around myself and my feelings. These walls weren’t protecting me; they were isolating me. The walls have come down, and I’m not afraid to show others when I’m not OK or when I’m struggling with something.

Now I get to walk through this world knowing that my support system is always there. The remarkable people who make up this support system aren’t an invisible safety net to catch me when I fall; rather they forge a foundation holding me up in this life. Plus, I know that I’m part of others’ support systems—returning the love, the empathy, and the I’ve-got-your-back mentality. Both feeling my own support system and feeling that I’m a base reinforcing others has dramatically reduced my anxiety.

In 2024, I challenge you to make a list of your support people and how they make you feel less alone. Make a list of whose backs you have too. Lean into this interconnectedness and know that you are not alone as you walk through this new year and beyond. Oceanic boundlessness can be unlocked for you, too. You just have to be willing to knock down your walls. If you’re having trouble doing the brick breaking, psilocybin may be able to help.


[1] Griffiths RR, et al. “Mystical-type experiences occasioned by psilocybin mediate the attribution of personal meaning and spiritual significance 14 months later.” J Psychopharmacol. 2008 Aug; 22(6): 621–632, https://doi.org/10.1177/026988110809430

Human Trafficking Awareness

Written By Kathryn Marsh, Prosecutor POV

Human trafficking is modern day slavery. While one may be forgiven in thinking human trafficking is a fairly recent phenomenon, having caught the media’s attention in the last decade, in reality human trafficking has been in existence since the beginning of time.

Legally human trafficking is split into two distinct categories: Labor Trafficking and Sex Trafficking.

Labor trafficking is not publicized to the same degree as sex trafficking. The Department of Health and Human Services provides services for trafficking victims and of the victims in Fiscal Year 2022, 62% of the adult survivors and 73% of child survivors they served were survivors of labor trafficking with an additional 12% of adults and 4% of children being survivors of both labor and sex trafficking. [i]

What is labor trafficking?

Labor trafficking is defined in the Trafficking Victim’s Protection Act as ”The recruitment, harboring, transportation, provision, or obtaining of a person for labor or services, through the use of force, fraud, or coercion for the purpose of subjection to involuntary servitude, peonage, debt bondage, or slavery.” Basically, this means forcing someone to provide labor or services against their will or choice. Labor trafficking is often accomplished through physical force, threats of force, isolation and the trafficker holding the workers pay or documents the worker would need to leave (license, visa, passport).

The industries where labor trafficking is most prevalent are: agri/aquaculture, domestic work, construction, landscaping, factories and manufacturing, and healthcare.[ii]  In the United States the most prevalent victims of labor trafficking are citizens of the United States, Mexico and Honduras.[iii]

You can learn more about Labor Trafficking at the US Department of Labor or Polaris websites. To make a report of suspected labor trafficking call the National Human Trafficking Hotline at 1-888-373-7888 or text INFO 233733.

What is Sex Trafficking?

 “Sex trafficking encompasses the range of activities involved when a trafficker uses force, fraud, or coercion to compel another person to engage in a commercial sex act or causes a child to engage in a commercial sex act.”[iv]

Sex trafficking, in reality, is rarely what we see in the movies where someone is kidnapped and forced into a brothel or auction. Victims are often trafficked by family members, loved ones, or trusted individuals. Due to grooming, obligation or fear of their alternatives, a victim may not even understand they’re being trafficked.

Anyone can be trafficked, but traffickers are master manipulators and look for some vulnerability to exploit.

Some vulnerabilities may include; mental health, substance abuse, homelessness, recent relocation, intimate partner violence, and involvement with child welfare/foster care system

What can you do to help reduce trafficking? 

Become familiar with the signs. Polarisproject.org provides ways to recognize trafficking in all its forms. Additionally, Polaris hosts a human trafficking training program on their website.

Watch what you buy. The Department of Labor keeps a list of products produced by forced or indentured labor.  Find the list here: https://www.dol.gov/agencies/ilab/reports/child-labor/list-of-products.  

Support survivor led projects and businesses that help provide survivors with job stability, housing, and mental health services.

Below I highlight three but there are hundreds more you can support.

Thistle Farms (thistlefarms.org) is a non-profit that helps women survivors by providing them a safe place to live, a job and a support system., free of charge.  You can support this mission and purchase products made by survivors on their website.

Atlanta Redemption Ink is a non-profit founded by trafficking survivor Jessica Lamb, is a national network for tattoo services and scar revisions.  They provide support services, tattoo removals and coverups to survivors of trafficking. You can support ARI at arionline.org.

AnnieCannons provides technical training to trafficking survivors and engages survivors on paid projects to build strong work portfolios and practical experience.  Survivors have designed and built software applications that have helped fight trafficking and gender-based violence.  Learn more at anniecannons.com


[i] 2023 Trafficking in Persons Report: United States; U.S. Department of State

[ii] Office for Victims of Crime – Human Trafficking Building Center “Understanding Labor Trafficking”

[iii] https://www.state.gov/reports/2023-trafficking-in-persons-report/united-states#:~:text=Of%20the%20731%20foreign%20national,in%20persons%20unspecified%20to%20HHS.

[iv] https://www.state.gov/what-is-trafficking-in-persons/

Why is inner work important? (Especially as a parent) What does healing + parenting look like together?

Written by AIM Parenting POV Contributor, Tina Hamilton, The Healing Parent

“Look what you did!” I shouted at her as she sat stunned on the kitchen counter.

“Don’t you see this mess?! What were you thinking?” I continued.

It wasn’t until her dad came running into the kitchen and grabbed me by the shoulders, shouting for me to take a breath before I realized what was happening.

My daughter, two at the time, was sitting on the counter as I cut tomatoes for a salad. She had leaned over to grab a tomato from the bowl when she accidentally pushed the bowl off the counter with her feet.

It was at that moment, when the bowl smashed to the ground, when I snapped.

Everything that followed is a blur, but I will never forget the feeling in my body that day.

The rage that consumed me. My inability to catch a breath. The way my hands and feet tingled. My racing heart.

And the look on her face that will be forever seared in my mind.

She was shocked. Startled. And terrified.

Her father scooped her up off the counter and whisked her out of the kitchen.

“Get a hold of yourself,” he said as he left me standing alone in the kitchen, the red tomatoes and dark green spinach peppered with shards of white ceramic bowl, at my feet.

I wish I could say that this was the moment when I answered the call for healing. But it would take a failed relationship and single parenting before I recognized that something deeper was begging for attention.

I believe there are two places in life when you will be shown glimpses of your pain and wounding: entrepreneurship and parenting.

While the path of entrepreneurship is not one that many are called to, more than half of all adults become a parent in their lifetime.1 And yet there is very little education or support available to parents to help them navigate the major life change.

People have been doing this for millennia. How hard could it possibly be?

Turns out, much harder than people let on.

When moms are pregnant, people will shower them with the cutest baby clothes and books. Parents often spend more time preparing the nursery than they do preparing themselves for the emotional impacts of having a child.

Simultaneously, there is very rarely a discussion about the emotional changes that accompany the transition to parenthood. Hormonal shifts aside, becoming a parent will trigger a flood of unfamiliar emotions, often catching parents off-guard.

It is in this deluge of emotion where parents, if willing, can uncover the wounds experienced in childhood that are at the root of their adult behaviors, thoughts, and habits.

What was experienced as a child shapes the way we see the world. As children, we learned how to act, speak, and think, by observing our parents and caregivers. Early-life experiences provide the foundational understanding of how the world works and how we are received and perceived by others.

And all of this shapes how we show up as adults, and most importantly, in how we parent our children.

Without intentionality, we will parent from the place of these learned behaviors and thought patterns. We will pass down the lessons that we learned without considering whether or not we believe those messages–whether they help us to expand with excitement and wisdom or shut down with fear and anxiety.

The moment I shared at the start of this piece was a glimpse of that unintentionality–the living and parenting from learned behaviors and thought patterns.

I was raised to believe that children should be seen and not heard. That children sit quietly without drawing attention to themself, and they are always on their best behavior. To act otherwise would result in loud shouting. Maybe even a belt or a wooden paddle.

And when my daughter (accidentally) pushed the bowl from the counter, she triggered the child-like fear within me. Simultaneously, I reacted with the same wrath I received from my caregivers and the protector part of me that kept me safe as a child–the internal voice that kept me from acting out to keep me safe as a child.

Inner healing work, as an adult, is important–necessary, even–to release the messages and lessons that we learned as children that no longer serve us. Inner work provides the opportunity to hand-select the thoughts, behaviors, and habits that we want to embody, while allowing us the space to release those that we no longer want to cling to.

Most importantly, though, inner work allows us the opportunity to intentionally parent our children. There is no one right way to parent. How you were parented as a child is not necessarily what is best for you (or your children), and you get to decide who you are as a parent. But that decision only happens when you do the inner work. Stay tuned for February’s issue when I share the ways to do that work.